When we work with affluent and ultra-high-net-worth families, we regularly review their financial picture to identify opportunities for greater efficiency, intentionality, and long-term impact. As wealth grows, many families eventually reach a point where they realize they have more than enough to support their own lifestyle and future goals.
At that point, the conversation moves beyond, “What do we want our wealth to accomplish?” to “What more can our wealth accomplish?” and philanthropy becomes a primary focus.
For some families, that means helping children and grandchildren. For others, it means supporting charitable causes that align with their values. More often than not, it involves both.
While there are many financial strategies available to help families transfer wealth efficiently, there is another side to strategic giving that is often overlooked. Thoughtful giving has a deeply emotional component. It can help strengthen family relationships, create meaningful conversations across generations, and bring greater purpose to wealth.
For many of our clients, the first—and often only—time they create a comprehensive giving plan is when they’re working with us. Fortunately, we’ve guided hundreds of families through the process and understand the questions to ask, the opportunities to consider, and the challenges that can arise along the way.
START WITH THE “WHY”
Once it has been determined that philanthropy will be a part of the overall financial plan, we encourage families to think about why they want to give in the first place.
What values do they hope to pass on? What impact do they want their wealth to have? What role should philanthropy play in their family’s future?
These questions are important for wealth owners to answer themselves, but they can be even more valuable when discussed with children, grandchildren, and other family members. We often encourage families to hold intentional conversations about their giving philosophy and consider whether they want future generations to carry on that philosophy, develop their own approach to giving, or do a combination of both.
For one client, we recommended a family getaway specifically to spend time together discussing their values, priorities, and vision for giving. Experiences like these can help families strengthen relationships and create a shared sense of purpose that guides their philanthropic decisions for years to come.
These conversations can also reveal things family members never knew about one another. One of our clients established a charitable giving structure that allowed each family member to support causes they cared about, with the requirement that everyone present why they chose those organizations.
What began as a conversation about charitable giving became an opportunity for family members to learn about one another’s passions and values that had never been openly discussed before.
CREATING ALIGNMENT ACROSS GENERATIONS
One challenge many families face is helping heirs understand why a portion of the family’s wealth may be directed toward charitable causes rather than passed entirely to future generations.
Without deliberate communication to share how these decisions have come about and explain the motivations behind them, they can create misunderstandings, even resentment. With intentional communication, these decisions can become powerful teaching and connection opportunities.
We often facilitate family meetings where parents share why philanthropy is important to them and explain the impact they hope their giving will have. These discussions help family members understand the purpose behind those decisions and often create greater appreciation for the role philanthropy plays within the family’s legacy.
In one case, a family planned to leave a significant portion of their estate to charity. Rather than making that decision privately, they involved their children in the conversation and explained the reasoning behind it. Together, they discussed how the children would still receive a significant amount of wealth, and, given that fact, whether additional wealth would meaningfully change the children’s lives compared with the impact those same funds could have on organizations and communities in need. As a result, the children gained a deeper understanding of their parents’ values and charitable goals, and what could have felt like a reduced inheritance instead became a shared family mission.
USING WEALTH TO BRING FAMILIES TOGETHER
Strategic giving doesn’t have to mean making charitable contributions or even preserving wealth in trusts for future generations. Sometimes it means using your wealth to create meaningful experiences today.
One family we work with found themselves receiving more income than they needed from required minimum distributions. They approached us looking for ideas on how to use those excess dollars in a meaningful way.
Rather than focusing solely on financial solutions, we encouraged them to think about experiences that could bring their family together. The result was an annual family trip involving children and grandchildren. The only stipulation? The parents would cover the costs, and each year a different family member (chosen by a draw from a hat) would be responsible for planning the next adventure.
After one trip, our client’s daughter-in-law was selected to organize the next year’s getaway. Throughout the next year, she and her mother-in-law spent months collaborating and discussing ideas for the trip. Our client told us that experience significantly strengthened their relationship and created a level of connection they hadn’t previously shared.
Our client has been hosting these trips for five years now, and they’ve increased the frequency to twice annually. What started as a practical conversation about excess income evolved into something much more meaningful—and fun.
WEALTH AS A TOOL FOR PURPOSE
Money alone cannot solve family challenges. But it can create opportunities.
It can help families rally around a common purpose. It can create experiences that bring generations together. And it can encourage meaningful conversations about values, stewardship, and impact.
At its best, strategic giving is not simply about transferring wealth. It’s about using wealth intentionally to support the people, causes, and values that are most important to your family.
If you’re interested in learning more about the technical side of charitable planning, we encourage you to read Monish’s Forbes article, “Giving with Purpose: Strategic Philanthropy for High-Net-Worth Families.”
The scenarios described above are for illustrative purposes only. They are not representative of the experience of all clients and do not guarantee future performance or success. This material is for informational purposes only and should not be construed as personalized investment, tax, or legal advice and individual results will vary. Investing involves risk, including the possible loss of principal.